I've created this post for anybody who is interested in my journey to my dream, as well as to hopefully motivate myself to continue writing. I hope that whoever reads this will help me stay motivated. Sometimes I just need a kick in the pants to get going.
2000-2010 - The Beginning of a DreamThe year was 2000 and the grade was 3rd. I was a shy kid, I usually didn't talk to anybody unless they talked to me first. I started to write a story, it was about masks that took over the world. To this day I don't understand what pushed me to ask the teacher if I could read my story in front of the class. I stood there and I read my ridiculous story in front of all my classmates. As the students were walking out of the classroom at the end of class, some of my classmates came over to my desk and started pestering me about my story. They asked if I was going to continue it, and if I would read more of it every class period. And so I did, for a week, and then I stopped.
This was the first of many stories that I started and never finished. Another story I began to write was named Siria. This story was about a planet called Elemental, where 5 different tribes of people with different elemental powers, fire, water, air, earth, and lightning, lived. Then a great war took place, and through the ashes a single man was born. The man was given the name Seth, and using unknown powers Seth revives all of the downed soldiers from each tribe. He then recruited the soldiers into building a new place for them to live, a huge city named Siria. The main character Drako, an abused air tribe boy who runs away from home, meets a group of black cloaked strangers who use him for an experiment with some type of huge power source. After an incident where he nearly dies, he runs away yet again and ends up on the battlefield where Seth resurrects the fallen warriors, making him the only one who personally witnessed the event. Seth invites him to live in Siria, and the story follows his life in Siria, the other tribes, and the mysterious black cloaked men and their power source.
The story that I worked on the most never had a title, but it was the story of another character named Seth who has lost his love through unknown means. One minute he is with the love of his life, the next moment he wakes up in a room that is completely white with no exit in sight. He is forced to live in the room for 3 years, with nothing but a visit from a man in black carrying a small amount of food every day. One faithful day he devises a way to escape, and when he leaves his embarks on a quest to find his love. Him and his new friend who helped save him travel across the barren wasteland of a world until they read Seth's hometown. Seth finds his love, and losses all grip when it is revealed that she doesn't remember him. Seth then must uncover the mystery behind her amnesia, but he doesn't know whether to start with her mind, or his own.
I hope that this background information has helped explain how important this novel is to me. It has been my dream ever since I knew how to write, and I have promised myself that I will not stop writing this current story until it is completed.
Late 2010-Early 2011 - Novel Writing BeginsThe main concept of this novel, including the name, was thought up in late 2010. I didn't begin writing the schematics for the novel until early 2011, and I began writing the first chapter in my second semester of college. After I had the general gist of the story down, I took a long break from writing in order to gain insight. I wrote notes in my phone all the time as ideas came to mind. I had an epiphany that all great ideas come when we are least expecting, and then they are gone. Like those nights where you sit in your car, watch the rain hit the windshield, and just sit in deep thought. Those moments are the most intimate moments in our lives, but they soon fade when they are interrupted by a car horn or a loved one asking "you okay?" My goal was to capture those moments in writing, and incorporate them into the novel.
1/16/12 - Research BeginsStill on my break from writing, I've decided that I want to do some professional research on the subject of insanity and divorce before continuing to write. I have a meeting with a divorce psychologist this Wednesday, and I'm hoping he has some insight into where I can find a insanity specialist as well. I plan on continuing to write as soon as my research is done, and I should be able to write at least 1 to 2 hours a week at school.
1/22/12 - The InterviewThe interview went above and beyond what I expected. Not only did I gain insight into insanity, loss, and abandonment, but the talk let the two of us bounce ideas back and forth pertaining to the actual content of the novel. I've also made a possible arrangement for a second interview with another psychologist who deals with more extreme cases and has a doctorate in psychologist studies. My interviewee also gave me a book called "The Journey from Abandonment to Healing."
I want to see if I can get this second interview before I start writing again, but I am asking myself a huge question: do I continue to write where I left off, do I edit what I did write, or do I start completely over? I'm not sure what I am going to do yet.
2/6/12 - On HoldI know nobody wants to hear me say that the novel is on hold, including myself, and I would be beating myself up about it, but it isn't entirely my fault. Olivia, my laptop, has gone to the dark side. Her backlight broke, and without that I cannot take her to school, where my writing is supposed to be taking place. I'm not worried about it though, because the extra time has given me the chance to work out some kinks I have been thinking of. I have been changing some of the general ideas in the novel, so I don't want to start writing again until I know where I am heading specifically. And I don't mean that as in I know the ending, because I don't. I intend on adopting a "let the novel write itself" style. I know the general direction, but I won't know the ending until I write it.
2/13/12 - ExcerptsI started writing again. In addition to that, I started a new excerpts page. I'm going to post certain parts, sometimes they will be very detailed and complete excerpts of what I hope will be the last edition, and sometimes they will be unedited rabble that I type up and have mixed feelings about. Either way, I hope that they help explain better how the novel will look, and serve as another motivational tool for my success. I will say that the novel is split into two different types of chapters. Every other chapter will be a first person look at an entry into the main characters journal. The novel itself will switch between third person and first person in this fashion. The first excerpt I posted is one of those journal entries, and you can find it here:
https://4-8forums.forumotion.com/t1939-novel-excerpts#21682 And once again, thank you for the support guys.
5/10/12 - A Time Has Been SetAs you can tell, it has been a while since I've posted here. Unfortunately, I must say that it will again be a long while before I post here in the future. The good news is that I have set a time where I will sit down and work on the novel, and only the novel, for multiple hours a week. The bad news is, this time doesn't start until the fall. My next semester classes have such a huge gap in them that I have multiple 4-5 hour breaks during the week. I will be using that time to do write, whether it be on campus or another place I decide to sit down and write. I have realized that a set time is the absolute way to go, without it I will never keep myself focused. So, in short, you'll be hearing about the novel again come this fall, and hopefully it is the last time I'll be talking about "beginning to write." Thanks again for your continued support
6/12/12 - On A TrainIt's a month into summer vacation and I've been as busy as ever with the site, 40 hours of work a week, and my personal life, especially the engagement and whatnot. I felt uninspired to write, and knew I didn't have the time or dedication to write over the summer, so I told myself I would hold off until the fall where I will have plenty of time on my breaks from class.
But now....well now I feel like I am sitting on a train. The train leads to my destination, everybody on the train is encouraging me to stay on course, the food tastes great, and the service is incredible. Yet I'm sitting in a seat by the window, looking out at the world passing by, and all I want to do is jump off that train.
I received this sudden urge to write. It wasn't a "I want to work on it" urge, it was a "I want to finish it" urge. I get them a lot, but this one is giving me an undying motivation and more importantly a sense of emptiness without that story in front of me. I know I don't have the time now, but this makes me want to make time. Even if it's only brainstorming, I want to do something, and I want to do it now.
The markerboard in my room has said since the beginning of summer "Ryan is waiting...this is your dream." He is waiting, and I don't want to make him wait anymore. Besides, he goes through enough trouble in the novel.
We'll see where this goes...hopefully forward.
8/21/12 - The Base of The MountainIt's a week before school starts, and it is also a week before my dream begins. Everything I have done over the summer and all the earlier stages of writing in my life come down to next week, and nothing I can say can really say can paint the picture correctly. It's as if your entire life you have wanted to climb Mt. Everest, and right now you are standing at the base and you are starting to realize that the journey ahead will most likely be too difficult. It's a harsh reality, and it's even harder to push through that and start climbing up the mountain anyways. To back out now would only mean you didn't follow your dream, but to begin and then quit means facing failure. A failure that you have worried about ever since you began dreaming of standing on top of the mountain.
But enough with pessimistic sounding talk, I
will climb this mountain, and I have every intention of failing several times. Perfection does not come without failure, and perfection is my ultimate goal.
It's funny to look at how many notes I have written. Everything I have is scattered because I receive my ideas at different times and write them down as soon as I get them. I have notes on my computer, on my old computer, on my phone, in the back of notebooks, even on school notes. The story itself is scattered in my brain, so a big part of beginning will be organizing my thoughts and deciding what it is I want to do before I write everything down. I want to do some more research as well, since it cannot hurt, and I love having conversations with people who are willing to help me.
Most importantly, I am just looking forward to returning to one of my long lost passions. I feel that not writing has left a large gap in my heart, and sometimes I feel as if I could be less stressed in general if I gave myself time to write. When I find myself in deep thought, I used to write just to calm and organize myself, but over the past year I have found myself losing my temper or letting thoughts aggravate me for long periods of time. Perhaps writing will help me mentally and therapeutically.
Thank you in advance to everybody who wishes to follow me over the next few months as I begin my journey. I will do my part by posting what I am comfortable posting and giving updates as often as I can. Your support in this, as well as everything else, means the world to me.
9/12/12 - The First Step Is Always The HardestI have started writing. I apologize for being so blunt, but as you can tell, I've been wanting to post that for quite some time now.
It's funny to see how long it took me to start. I promised I would being writing when school started, but it took me three weeks into the semester to begin. It seems that all of my preparing and conversations with people about not being able to begin writing didn't help much, but in the end, it did work.
I don't want to give a date, because we all know it won't be accurate, but I do want to say that I am fully prepared to post the first "chapter" of my writing. I put chapter in quotes because I am not fully convinced it will be the first chapter of the novel, but for now I believe it will be a good way to start off the story unless I decide on something else down the road. Everything in this novel will change many times over the course of its writing process, so keep in mind that what you see here will most likely be changed by the time the novel is complete. However, what I do post here will be an extremely edited copy and probably will not be rough drafts of any kind.
Thanks again for the support, and I hope to post here again very soon!
1/18/13 - A Working FormulaIt has been a long time since I have posted, and a long time since I have started writing, but I
have made some progress. I have also decided on a new tactic to writing that I hope helps. Instead of trying to give myself large amounts of time to sit down and write, I am instead giving myself a few minutes every day to write a sentence or two, and go over what I wrote the previous day. I can also use the time in-between to brainstorm, which helps.
Right now, I am working on Chapter 2, but that doesn't necessarily mean Chapter 1 is complete. I am hoping though, once I have completed both Chapter 1 and 2, that I will be confident enough to send it to some of you who are interested.
Thanks again for anybody who reads these posts, as sporadic as they are. I hope to make you all proud!
1/29/13 - One Small Step For RyanFinally the day that I've been waiting for. I'm hesitant and nervous, but I figure there's no way to know what kind of reaction I'm going to get unless I just do it. So, I believe I have finished the first, very small portion, of the novel. It's only a few pages, but it represents over a year of frustration and hopes.
I'm not going to post it here, so if you want it you'll have to email me. Just email
48Productions@zoho.com and I'll send it to you.
Subject: Updates On My Novel 
